Waiting For A Miracle!

Last Wednesday, I start having severe headache, dizziness and neck discomfort. I thought I was exhausted and I plan to back home early to rest. I leave the Bible class before it come to the end but just notice that a truck was blocking my way. I was super frustrated and I complaint it to my BF. I don’t know who to share with, beside him. He listened to my complaint and was waiting for me to reach home before he went to bed. I asked him to pray for me as well.
 

The next day, the condition was still the same. I was having severe headache with my neck muscle was quite tense. On Sunday, I told my church brothers and sisters about my condition. They tease me by saying my head was too heavy as I put on weight. I really feel my condition was not normal. I think I might need to seek for some medical advice the next day.

On Monday morning, I told my nursing sister about my condition.I asked her to give me the medical chit to consult the doctor. Coincidentally these two days we were having external auditors came for visiting in our hospital. They were so busy attending the auditors and I only can go to consult the doctor on my lunch time. The Medical officer review my case and she suspect that I was having cervical spondylosis. She asked me to go for an X-ray and review the result later.

My X-ray result was not normal. Conclusion from the doctor was “reduce C4/C5 disc 

space”.

The next medical officer on call asked me to refer to the orthopedic specialist. The on call specialist on the day was Mr. LWP which was good in this area. But sadly I was not able to consult him as I was an old case of another specialist. I only get to consult my orthopedic specialist on the next day because today was his operation day.

I really have no confidence in my own orthopedic surgeon. I pray that God will send me a good doctor or else He could bless the doctor with His wisdom to rule out what’s wrong with me.

On the next day, I went to consult the orthopedic specialist as planned. Before I get to told him all my complaints, he has diagnoses me as migraine. He refers me to another neurosurgeon without giving me any chance to talk about my X-ray findings. That was truly beyond my expectation. In my mind, I thought he could refer me to consult another orthopedic surgeon. Thank be to God, He surprise me with something beyond my expectation.  But again, I need to wait to consult the neurosurgeon as he was having an operation in the morning.

During the time of waiting, that was the most suffering moment to me. My head was really struggling to function as normal. I nearly lost my patience while waiting. I wish to know what’s wrong with me earnestly. 

The neurosurgeon told me that my neck muscle was injured and it causes my neck pain and headache. I asked him what I can do to make my neck back to normal. He just asks me to REST and don’t try lift any heavy stuff anymore. I told him I did an X-ray and it shows something wrong with my cervical bone. He told me the physiology of my neck was different with normal people. My cervical curve was reverse, that was causing my neck muscle easily get injured and degenerate. I was concerned much on what the Medical officer has suspected —Cervical Spondylosis. He told me from the X-ray, he saw my disc space was still good. Thank You, Jesus.

The doctor has given me some medication for my headache and neck pain. He doesn’t seem to ask me for any follow up. That’s surprise me. The next day, after taken the medication, my headache was relieved. Thanks God! But my neck still can feel the tiredness and tightness at times. 

I asked for prayers from my family, my BF and some of my church brothers and sisters. I believe that God, You are my great Healer. You can restore my cervical bone curve miraculously.

My BF keep encourage me to believe in God’s healing and he told me he has prayed for me to have a strong neck. I truly thank God for him.

Besides praying, I was also looking for some exercises to strengthen my neck muscle. While looking for some ways to improve it, I feel I was quite labor to get back my health. At night, I even try to made a neck roll to support my neck. I not really can sleep well with a weird support below my neck. In the early morning about 4am, I wake up uncommonly.

I told my BF in the morning, and he encourages me to ask the Lord for the reason I was awake at the odd hours. Besides, I still can feel the stress on my neck. Yet, sometimes I can feel my nerve of my hand was affected as well. I am not feeling good about that. I prayed to God. I even cry to him as I was truly suffered from the condition. 

God is good to me. The Word came in my mind on the right time. He comforts me with His Word. I truly know that “sickness was not come from God”. God so loved me and even crush His beloved Son, Jesus for me. How much more He will not freely give me all that He has. As Jesus is healthy in the world, so am I. I will inherit all He has from the world. The only thing I need to do was to guide my heart. “Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid”. (John 14:27)

I texted one of my church brother and told him about my condition. He asked me some of the questions. He asked “why God doesn’t heal me immediately?” He told me that He was praying for his mom for her skin disease. Her mom also seems to lose her patient while praying for healing. I asked him back, “do you really believe God will heal?” He says “Yes, but why take so long?” I told him, “If you believe God can heal and will heal, why you doubt and question God when nothing seem happened right now?” In Roman 8:28, we know all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. God timing was perfect. Since, we know His intention was to heal, and then we should have no doubt. While explaining to him, these words speak to me as well. God used this conversation to speak to me.

I know His GRACE and LOVE for me so well. Is time to believe and let the healing manifest in my life! Thank You, JESUS. I know You are Able and You are Willing to heal me :)
Praise Lord!